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The disability world is full of romance myths, some of which can be incredibly disheartening for members of the disability community, and when assumptions are particularly destructive, they can actually perpetuate ableism. Despite common misconceptions, negative stereotypes, and ableist assumptions, people with disabilities fall in love every day. Dating with a disability is possible; disability can be part of a happily ever after. These are some of the most common disability dating myths and the facts that prove them wrong. One common assumption is that 'normal' or typical dates aren't possible for people with disabilities. This is a myth. People with disabilities enjoy the same things that able-bodied people do, and dating is no exception.

Disability is not a burden.

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Many people with disabilities are capable of fulfilling their own basic needs without help. Some people do require the assistance of loved ones and caregivers, but the same can be said for members of the able-bodied community, who need support in different ways. People with disabilities can provide emotional support, compassion, and companionship to their partners. Relationships that include disability are no different from able relationships: they involve give and take from both parties.

Often, it's believed that people with disabilities are incapable of engaging in fun events and adventures, like travel, concerts, festivals, and so on. This is false.

People with disabilities may have different needs or may use different supports to participate in fun activities, but they are capable of enjoying the same things that able-bodied people enjoy. Like any group of people, people with disabilities are diverse, and they approach life from many different perspectives.

Protection from abuse

What classifies as a 'normal' relationship? Every relationship is different because every person is different.

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While disability may influence the dynamic of a couple, it isn't the sole factor in predicting what a relationship will look like or whether it will succeed.

For people with disabilities, 'normal' is as subjective and variable as it is for anyone else. Dating can be difficult for a lot of people, but disability doesn't reduce anyone's chances of finding true love.

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The key to finding a good, healthy relationship is approaching dating with an open mind and plenty of self-confidence! Most of the stories here on LiveQuickie. Do you have a story to tell?

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Disability Dating Myths The disability world is full of romance myths, some of which can be incredibly disheartening for members of the disability community, and when assumptions are particularly destructive, they can actually perpetuate ableism. Myth 1: 'Normal' Dates Aren't Possible for People with Disabilities One common assumption is that 'normal' or typical dates aren't possible for people with disabilities.

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Myth 2: Dating with a Disability Is Awkward Yes, dating with a disability can be awkward, but only because dating itself, regardless of ability, can be awkward. Estrellado was active on several dating platforms like Tinder in the hope of finding a significant other.

Instead, she discovered men who wanted to be physically intimate but not fully commit to a relationship.

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For months, she would secretly hook up with men she met online. Estrellado has six personal aides who switch day and night shifts throughout the week. Then one man accidentally dropped her on the way to the bedroom, resulting in severe injury, and she had to tell her friends and family the truth.

Her best friend was upset that she had put herself in a situation where people took advantage of her.

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Estrellado says. For three months during recovery, Ms. Ally Bruener, 28, is a standup comedian with congenital muscular dystrophy.

Dating For Disabled is an online dating service for people with disabilities. We are a community where disabled singles can find love & friendship. Dating4Disabled is the number one disabled dating site, and registration is one hundred percent free! Dating 4 Disabled. K likes. We are an online community which offers the opportunity for people with disabilities to share & connect Followers: K.

As part of her onstage persona, Ms. Bruener, who lives in Alexandria, Ky. She surprises them with crude jokes. Her hope is to break down the misconception that people with disabilities should be treated like children or nonsexual beings.

I interviewed 16 women with mild to moderate learning disabilities who were members of Stars in the Sky, a pioneering dating agency that you might recognise from the Channel 4's Undateables. Dec 08,   Dating With a Disability Women with disabilities often begin to date much later in life, and they struggle in a dating culture that places a premium on physical appearance. Whispers4u Disabled Dating Service. Trusted online since - Disabled singles can find love and friendships. Free to register and browse. Advanced chat & photo search for singles near you.

At one of her comedy shows, a woman walked up to Ms. But Ms.

Dating With a Disability

Bruener does actually know what she is talking about. Bruener says she finally felt like she was being taken seriously as a potential mate.

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But experience has taught her that she is still vulnerable in the dating world. InMs. McCauley exchanged numbers with a man she met through a mutual friend. Monica, for example, said:. But there should be a balance between protecting people from abuse and enabling them to get into relationships, otherwise people are denied their right to do so.

To prevent abuse, people with learning disabilities should have access to sex and relationships education, and caregivers should be prepared to discuss issues on sex and relationships openly in a proactive, rather than reactive, way. This would equip people with the knowledge they need to enjoy relationships in a safe way.

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Not being open or only dealing with issues in a reactive way is more likely to leave people vulnerable to abuse. Professionals and caregivers also inappropriately apply the Mental Capacity Act to some people with learning disabilities, especially those with severe learning disabilities.

The act states that the capacity to consent to sexual relationships must be assumed unless proven otherwise and an unwise decision does not necessarily imply a lack of capacity.

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Research that reviewed cases on the capacity to consent to sexual activity highlighted failures in the implementation of the act and suggested a reframed capacity assessment informed by research into sexual decision making.

Special dating agencies can enable people with learning disabilities to find relationships and broaden their social networks. The decade has seen a growth of friendship and dating groups for people with learning disabilities, including HeartVentureLuv2meetU and matesndates. They match people interested in forming relationships and support them on their first date. Stars in the Sky, one of the first to be set up, by two women with learning disabilities, is now unfortunately closing due to financial constraints.

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It also featured in The Undateables, and it is clearly evident from the series that support can enable people with learning disabilities to form relationships. And success is not only measured by a successful date but by the confidence that individuals gain by going on a date, too. I was struggling to find anyone on my own. And I want, I guess what every girl, woman would like to have partner or companion to share things with.

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    2 Comments

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